The " & System" of Judging Movies

The "& System" of Judging movies is carefully constructed, almost scientific in it's amazingness, and just about fool-proof. Of course, nothing on the big green globe is actually fool-proof, and I have several fools I can prove that theory with. In the meantime, let's take a look at the way we judge movies on this here blog.

There are usually 5 &'s possible, but if a movie tickles my fancy beyond normal fingers-in-the-ribs tickleness, I might just give it 6. There's no stopping me. I'm a rebel in every sense of the word.

A 5 & Movie is gonna be great. Worth watching, probably worth buying (or burning, although I don't condone such behavior. Piracy is robbery, you fools! Just think of the money you are stealing from the hungry mouths of movie executives' - or even, gasp, stars'- babies. Little Paris Maria Appletosh might have to go without that thirteenth Prada baby blanket if you download or burn a movie. Ok, you've been warned.)

A 4 & movie is going to be good.
A 3 & movie is going to be OK.
A 2& movie is kinda stupid.
A 1 & movie is a waste of my life.
A NO & movie is a breath-stealingly horrible flick that should be banned in all English (or Engrish) speaking countries due to pure awfulness.

At the bottom of my review, I'll tell you the &s I give it, and what some of the things I might say about it are that correspond to the &s..... like, "& it had Steve Martin actually being funny- not like in the Pink Panther".
Got it? Got it. I think it's pretty simple. But then again, you might be pretty simple too, and find all of this confusing. Please email me in that case and I will arrange for your state-funded lobotomy personally.